A page of IRC quotes. Proceed with caution.
Quotes 3501 to 3600

Quote 3501
* Baro`^ looks at the guard "We have a magic beast?"
<AlcarDM> Captain: "White furred, possibly from the mountains. Some noble brought it, apparently planning to kill it and tan it's hide as a gift for the former Emperor."
<Baro`^> "Your highness, I also suggest we create more farms.. perhaps if we converted some battlefields into farmland.."
<Baro`^> "I also suggest we kill the beast and sell it's skin.. it will give us a start..."
<Althalus```> "You should see the beast before you sell it's hide. One skin will not fund an empire."
Quote 3502
<Vallard> "I think that idea about getting more crops sounds good..."
<SamHall> "Crops would be nice, your majesty, if our fields were not already overfarmed."
<Althalus```> "Then mass production of some other commodity is probably our best choice."
<Vallard> (( snowglobes. ))
<Baro`^> (( No, samhall might get turned on ))
<SamHall> ((I don't make fun of your character's sexual preferences! =P))
<Baro`^> (( That's cause I'm a heterosexual =p ))
<SamHall> ((Oh, and that's not humourous now? =P))
Quote 3503
* Dele`^ opens the gate "Come out."
* Umagoro eyes the open gate and backs away from it a bit and eyes it from the middle of his cell
<Dele`^> "Come on, we're going to get you a teacher.."
Quote 3504
* Dele`^ motions for umagoro to come, much like calling a dog
<AlcarDM> « "Heel, Umagoro!" Umagoro attacks your heel... »
Quote 3505
* Maritermus leaves the room
* Baro`^ says in a low tone "I don't know, but I don't think I like him.."
* Baro`^ might hire himself to kill him...
Quote 3506
<Althalus```> "Yes, very well. So, the question is, which families might be willing to marry into the kings line?"
Quote 3507
* Vallard looks around at everyone. "I don't think this is a good idea."
<SamHall> "The Lady Alyen of Eris or Lady Sarah of Manchee"
<Althalus```> "Whether or not it's a good idea is irrelevant. We're exploring one possibility."
<AlcarDM> The royal treasurer stares at Sam "Lady sarah . .as bride of the king? She's 2!"
<SamHall> "Well, it's not like the King is getting older."
<SamHall> "She'll catch up to him in practically no time!"
Quote 3508
<Althalus```> "To protect her, she would most likely be in the care of her family most of the time. We'd have a sit-in here, until she's older."
<AlcarDM> The Chancellor, midly as always: "A sit in to protect her virginity?"
<Althalus```> "If you're not going to offer anything useful, keep quiet. I don't need another young fool flapping his gums."
<SamHall> ((lol. that was directed at The King? =P))
<Althalus```> (no, the chancellor)
<Baro`^> (( the chancelor is 720 years older than you =p ))
<SamHall> ((I can't believe you're messing with the chancellor *hides under the table*))
Quote 3509
<AlcarDM> Chancellor: "Nations are founded on people, not magic," quietly. He looks at Althalus "Magic is only half of this world, it cannot be the basis of an empire in this world."
<Althalus```> "I understand that. But we need to put some money back in the royal coffers. I'm attempting to circumvent the whoring of our King."
<Vallard> "I'm all for circumventing that."
Quote 3510
<SamHall> "Personally I am in favor of a combination of all of these plans. Our king has to marry in any case."
<Althalus```> "Indeed. I'm personally for marrying him when we're in a bit higher position of power."
<AlcarDM> Chancellor: "The king is also not alive. That will cause some .. issues. Particularly in the producing of offpsring."
<Vallard> "What he said." *indicating the Chancellor*
<SamHall> "I am sure we will be able to find a way around that."
<SamHall> "I have actually been giving it some thought lately. *Gestures at his other sleeve."
<Vallard> "Oh God.."
Quote 3511
<Althalus```> "Let's not get off track here. Does anyone have anything else to say about the marriage option?"
<Vallard> "That we aren't doing it."
<Baro`^> "He could adopt.."
<Althalus```> "Dully noted, Your Majesty. Anything else?"
Quote 3512
<SamHall> "behold this frog! Kiss it and she will become a princess! Marry HER!"
<SamHall> "It appears not to have worked..."
<SamHall> "Wait, I know! She's a FROG PRINCESS!"
<AlcarDM> The king turns into a frog :)
* Vallard kisses the frog. It dies :P
<SamHall> "Marry her and all of the frogs of the land will unite behind you, your majesty!
<AlcarDM> "Well, tadpoles will give us LOTS of heirs.."
Quote 3513
<Baro`^> The catch is, you have to marry their daughter
Quote 3514
* Vallard throws a ball of blue-green fire at SamHall :P
<SamHall> lol!
<Vallard> better than having to marry their son, I suppose :P
<Baro`^> oh! there's an idea
<SamHall> Vallard: well, he was their son until they found out that the king is male
Quote 3515
* Umagoro fallows dele in the door
* Dele`^ walks into the trone room proudly "I found the problem your highness.."
* Umagoro stops in the door way and scans the room as his eyes widen in terror and takes off running down the hall howling
* Vallard blinks and looks at where Umagoro momentarily was, then looks at Dele`^. "Oh?"
<Dele`^> "I would like you all to meet Umagoro.."
<Dele`^> "Uh... that didn't go well..."
Quote 3516
* Dele`^ runs after umagoro
Quote 3517
<AlcarDM> but your pc is smarter than the DM then! That's no fair! :p
<Althalus```> that's okay, it balances out. my pc's smarter than his player, too :)
Quote 3518
* Althalus``` meant it to represent his deep understanding and connection to magic, mostly
Quote 3519
<Vallard> wow, its really unorthodox to have a Yeti in a throne room, eating and feeding a bunny in the background :P
<Althalus```> but it's sort've post-impressionistic. it's deep, yo
Quote 3520
<Vallard> yeah, next sessions is when the plagues and giant ti waves come in :P
<Althalus```> well... plagues, maybe. haven't decided what we need to do to the other countries yet
<Vallard> send them Tarrasques?
<AlcarDM> gift wrapped
<Vallard> it big boxes, so they cant tell what it inside. Marked "do not open til X-Mas". They should be good and hungry by then :p
<Baro`^> How do you keep a tarrasque in a box?
<Umagoro> large trunk of holding :)
<AlcarDM> the same way you keep universal solvent in a container, duh!
<Vallard> with tape, duh :P
<Vallard> Duct Tape can hold anything :P
Quote 3521
<Warner> hehe eman is a true CFer. He was created so that I could tell the DM all about him in less then one paragraph.
<Alcar> Eman was fun.
<Warner> He's so simple even hard as DMs would have to let me use just a single wish spell just to create him from scratch :) no need for and's :)
<Warner> hard ass
<Warner> if your taking quotes alcar please note corrections :)
Quote 3522
<Warner> my faverite Eman moment was when he rolled a 20 and finally killed something. Was his first hit in battle. He was pukeing his guts out from the sheer terror of it.
<Alcar> Yeah .... wish more people rped low level pcs like that :)
<Warner> Someone actually thought he was a vegitarian from the way he was acting. Had to go out of carictor and explain the concept of being shocked by your first kill when you wern't raised watching bloody movies video games and the 6 oclock news
Quote 3523
<Warner> Now that would be fun. Give the DM a full on power PC to NPC as your mom :)
<Alcar> "You didn't brush your teeth?" *aura of doom*
<Warner> "No dragon slaying till you clean your room!" "But Moooom, its terrorising the local population" "No butts! The dragon will just have to wait till you take out the trash"
<Warner> "I'll go kill the dragon you do your homework" "Aw mom!"
<Alcar> "But ma, I want the experience!" "What use is experience if you don't do your math and can't add it, hmm?"
<Warner> "All my friends play with decks of manythings" "I said no! you'll earn your experance killing orcs like your father did."
Quote 3524
<Warner> Suprize your PCs with it "As you turn left at the T in the passageway you encounter a horrible sight! You mom is showing the orcs you were about to kill photos of you being potty trained!"
Quote 3525
<Alcar> "You can only go out to fight those orc raiders if you take your sister. It's your turn to look after her, you know."
<Warner> Oh god draging your little sister thru a dungeon crall :)
<Alcar> Wouldn't it be funny, tho? :)
<Alcar> "No, don't touch that ... button."
<Warner> oh man I can see an adventure based exactly on that. You have to free the children of a vilage and it turns out one of the victoms is your little sister. you save her, the way back is blocked. So for the next 17 dungeon levels you have to deal with her screeming durning every fight and while your trying to move silently shes whining about needing to potty :)
<Warner> buttons I could deal with. that parts like having a kender in the party.
<Warner> oh but a kender and your little sister together.... *Shudder*
Quote 3526
<Alcar> The party advances down the dungeon, hearing some off "Goo goo" sounds and finds your PC with some orc babies, baby-sitting them.
<Alcar> "Hey, you guys went all through the those 5 levels? Why not just use the entrance..."
<Warner> now thats a way to introduce a PC whos player has been gone for awhile :)
Quote 3527
<WarezBert> so is the axon party evilish?
<Alcar> Evil is relative :)
<Alcar> They did kill the last Emperor and some of them have been trying to marry a lich to a 2 year old girl, however.
<Alcar> That's evil in most people's books :p
Quote 3528
<WarezBert> mmm
<WarezBert> 6 feet of black steel
<WarezBert> thats a giants sex tool
Quote 3529
* aslhk begins to head away from the remaining walls, but one of his wheels falls into a crack in the floor and gets stuck.
* Sir_Perfluous goes over and helps the poor robot out of the crack, looking at the walls nervously.
<aslhk> "My wheel is stuck!"
<aslhk> "Thank you sir!"
<aslhk> Sir_Perfluous and aslhk, in classic style, clear the area just as the walls collapse.
<Sir_Perfluous> "I am just doing my duty.." tries to shove aslhk away from the walls. "Just .. doign my durty ... can you ... hurry. Thank you!"
Quote 3530
<Sir_Perfluous> An old woman dressed in grey and carrying a book comes hurrying over from a large building made from Lego. "Excuse me? Excuse me? Is this the Jefferrson's home? We're owed 300 yearsd in back taxes, you know."
<aslhk> "This is an automated response. I am sorry, the Jeffersons are not in right now. Please leave a message with aslhk, texas instrument robot model J34qq niner, and they will respond at their earliest opportunity. Thank you.
* Sir_Perfluous recalls the better part of valour and backs away "Well, I was just a .. bystander .... I don't know anything about taxes. Nothing at all. I'm a wandering knight in the quest of ... of .... " *thinks* "I knew I'd recalled it yesterday.."
<Sir_Perfluous> « <-- was on a quest to drink from the river of forgetfullness. However, as a result he doesn't recall the quest nor where the river is :p »
Quote 3531
<Alcar> lovcraftian baywatch would be funny "Oh, no, Pamela went out into the ocean?!" "That's not a drowning big breasted woman in makeup, that's a tentacle! It' hit her!" "Look, shes flying away through the air. It must have popped!" *general rejoicing and merriment*
<Alcar> Next session; "Jerry Springer and Women Saved From Cthulhu By Breast Implants."
Quote 3532
<ArthurQ> Im considering throwing a lamp into the game ala ring of 3 wishes.
<ArthurQ> i just KNOW someones gonna make an illconsidered wish
* Sintaqx wishes that goblins were more like kender.... whoops...
Quote 3533
<SnailSlug> i'd like to see any hacker hack into an intelligent computer
<Tech-sensei> Easy. Take 1 chainsaw. Dangle above mainframe. "Give me access or i drop the chainsaw." Computer is inteligent, self aware, thus self-preservant.
Quote 3534
<durgan`> "This demon's sleep is being guarded by all of the demons of the north. They are more afraid of its awakening than anything else. If you choose to view it as just another demon, that is your prerogative, but it seems to me like calling a mountain a pebble because they're both rocks."
<AlcarDM> The Old Man chuckles, a dry rasping sound, and looks at durgan "Amusing. Do you have proof to back that up?"
Quote 3535
<Mors`^> "So.. you dom't believe in gods?"
<AlcarDM> Kel: "Of course not. If there were gods, they would aid us."
<Maranda`-`> "They gave up on us along time ago. or so i've gatherred"
<AlcarDM> Kel: "We made the gods. They could not give up on us."
<Mors`^> "They have given up. And some are stuck here, with the mortals.."
<AlcarDM> The blood lord Kel glares at the god fo death and says: "How would you know the gods are among us?" Earning most stupid NPC statement of the night hands down.
Quote 3536
* Maranda`-` holds the man down kissing his forhead and shuttering all at once
<Mors`^> "Oooohhh The kis of death.."
* Allynor watches
<Allynor> "I'm rather glad I don't have a stomach. I don't think it could handle this..."
Quote 3537
<AlcarDM> He nods, then takes a deep breath and says - fighting to get the words out - "Thank the demon, too, for saving.. us." And vanishes before you can reply.
<Maranda`-`> now thats high prase out of a blood
<Allynor> sad that he'll probably be burned at the stake as a traitor :)
<Maranda`-`> to say the least
<Maranda`-`> probubly drain him of his blood in an act of "purification"
<Allynor> or at the very least work in the infomercial business for the rest of eternity. Depends on how lenient they're feeling.
<AlcarDM> Allynor - That's a bit TOO evil :)
<Allynor> well like i said, if they're nice, they'll just kill him :)
Quote 3538
* Amandis bleeds to death, his last thoughts not on his master but on the fact that maybe anger was bad and that his head really does hurt an awful lo...
<Dungeon_Master_M> Amandis Wanders twords a bright white light at the end of a long tunnel when suddenly he stops and says to himself... "Screw this, too far." then he turns and heads back.
<Amandis> « "Wait, I forgot to shut the stove off! I'll be right back!" »
<Worra> (dude it was your head inside the gas oven that caused your death! what do you mean you forgot to turn it off?)
Quote 3539
<AlcarGM> ooh! Revive old royal rules on polygamy!
<AlcarGM> You can marry vallard each session :p
<Hugh`-> oh gods
<Hugh`-> I hope we dont make Queens a major import :P
Quote 3540
<Darkkin> A friend of mine a great dm died Monday
<Hugh`-> oh, man.
<Dark83> my condolences...
* Darkkin does not think he'll get a reply to his last email he sent to the dead dm
<Hugh`-> probably not.
Quote 3541
<Elana-Silvereye> lets have an rpg where we are all normal people that get together and play an rpg
<Caltak> oh oh we should play an RPg wheere we are people playing a Pen and Paper RPG who are playing a video game rpg who are playing a different pen and papaer RPg who are playing us! :)
Quote 3542
<Adanine> ¸How about cavemen RPG?
<Alcar> Adanine - Done that too :p
<Adanine> Fuck
<Darkkin> We've done alot of that odd ball stuff here
<Caltak> nope, he hasnt done <B>that</B> yet :P
* Caltak laughs
* Alcar lights Caltak on fire :p
Quote 3543
<Baro`^> "As I said your highness, perhaps you should show the public there is no reason to hate you."
<SamHill> (("Marry a peasant!"))
<SamHill> ((We can have her murdered and start a war with Gildas!... wait... wrong script.))
Quote 3544
<AlcarDM> There is motion in the door way and a cold, haughty voice says "That is not your only worry, Vallard." Elliande Almago enters the room, her presence filling it. "There is also the matter of the destruction of my city to deal with."
<SamHill> (("Perhaps you'd like to marry our king in recompense?"))
Quote 3545
<Baro`^> "What is needing repairs in the city?"
<SamHill> ((loL!!!!))
<AlcarDM> <Elliande Almago> "What needs repairs?" She glares at Baro "Almago is no more!"
<SamHill> ((you should read the site =P))
<AlcarDM> She stares at Vallard. "On behalf of my people, I wish to know what you plan to do about it.
<Maritermus> (("We will send you a get well card"))
Quote 3546
<AlcarDM> <Elliande Almago> looks at Maritermus disdainfully "And you are...?" imperiously.
<Maritermus> "Maritermus Royal Advisor"
<Vallard> "Of the New Hampshire Royaladvisors?" :)
Quote 3547
<Vallard> "Bah, politics."
<AlcarDM> <Sytus Idorian> "They are rather unavoidable when one is a king."
<Vallard> "Unfortunately."
Quote 3548
<AlcarDM> Ok, the crown of the moon is not as old as the world, but it is as old as the moon, perhaps it created the moon (or vice versa). The only legends about it are Ithacan and they believe it was the heart of the temple of the moon in their lands, and that it's light came rom the other world where all magic comes from.
<Althalus```> does it seem to do anything else? any ceremonies it was used for, like summoning death beams from the moon?
<AlcarDM> « Well, it was borrowed by a mad Emperor once who wanted to blow up other worlds and kept calling it his Death Star and killing anyone who said it was moon... »
Quote 3549
<Baro`^> it is very noble to say 'make it so.' and call your next in comand #1
<Vallard> no, thats very stupid and lame :)
Quote 3550
* Baro`^ hopes Elliande likes the poem he wrote for her... =p
* AlcarDM hopes your pc didnt seriously write a poem :p
<Baro`^> 'I can be your hero baby...' lol
<Baro`^> no, but I did send her flowers ^_^
<Vallard> "Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Girls dogs are Bitches, and so are you."
* Vallard considers submitting that to #poetry...
Quote 3551
<Tech-Sensei> two levels of paladin, one level of monk, one level of sorcerer, what do you get?
<Tech-Sensei> A stunning smiting true strike boot to the head!
<Tech-Sensei> now wnat to hear what's scary?
<Tech-Sensei> I actually intend to do that
<Tech-Sensei> Gonna play a char with the long term equivilent of attention deficite disorder. He just constantly shifts what he's doin.
Quote 3552
<Gunden`^> (( I'm a treasure hunter, and don't you forget it... callme thief one more time, and I'll steal your tounge for you... ))
Quote 3553
<Setesh> i don't remember him [link] tracking.
<Katie_F> he tracked zora and found his way through lost woods
<ArthurQ> thats not tracking!
<ArthurQ> thats luck and a damned video game with a predetermined path
Quote 3554
<ArthurQ> you need a Feat to track :-P which i personally think is stupid
<Setesh> ArthurQ: indeed.
<Setesh> "you see tracks" "i don't have the track feat" "they're big tracks"
Quote 3555
<Dungeon_Master_M> Once I had a group of PC's who's battle tactic was to have the Party fighter engage the enemy while wearing a ring of Protection from Fire. Then the 3 Spellcasters would release Area effect Fire Spells on the fighter hurting everyone around him.
<Dungeon_Master_M> In order to teach the group a leason When the fighter engaged the enemy in a crowded city street a group of spectators gathered to watch
<Dungeon_Master_M> In the end half the city was in a uproar trying to rid the town of the Lawful Good Party of Adventurers
Quote 3556
<Reykemias> monkey: do u have parents?
<Monkey_Magi> yeah, but they arent about to loan me cash to go see you guys
<ArthurQ> dont tell em its for D&D
<ArthurQ> say you really want to see NYC
<ArthurQ> and spend a weekend there
<ArthurQ> for the Culture
<ArthurQ> and expereience points
<ArthurQ> err
<ArthurQ> Experience
Quote 3557
<Kent```> "Anyway, everyone introduce yourselves to the System. System, record voice and brain wave patterns for Andy and Greg for System control."
<Andrew`-> "Um, hi System, I'm Andy."
<Greg``> "Hi, System. I'm Greg."
<Greg``> System: "Patterns acknowledged. Degree of control granted?"
<Kent```> "What are the degrees?"
<Andrew`-> (( "Centigrade or Fahrenheit." ))
<Kent```> ((Dammit, i want Kelvin!))
Quote 3558
<Kent```> "Yeah. The mirror is some ex-Mercurian, i think. He's the maneur in that one shed. I think it's some sort of strange jail cell."
Quote 3559
<Alcar> gemm was telling me about the detective of the watch. It seems like a neat one, even tho there are some aspects of it I'd change. A party of pcs being a town watch would be a fun game, tho :)
<Alcar> level 1 pcs. the rest of the watch was killed by some "good' adventurers....
<Baliadoc> oh totally. the detective is neat :)
<Alcar> Mayor: "You're the town guard now." PCs: "Why?" Mayor: "Well, you're new, so you have no preconceptions, loyal, we don't have to pay you much, you need jobs, you're expendable ... Hey! Who wrote this sppech?"
Quote 3560
* Alcar thinks if I'd run it I'd have one player make a detective pc then the others make level 1 pcs.
<Alcar> detective is sort of the captain/mentor and called out of retirement because the rest of the watch was butchered.
<Baliadoc> ahh, the grizzly old bastard type of guy :)
<Alcar> If the player wanted, yup :)
<Alcar> "Yes, I know. I know. Ok, yes sir. He stabbed you through the heart. But youre a vampire! You're not alive, so I don't think its murder.."
<Alcar> Vampire: "Ah hah! Discrimination!"
<Alcar> "Self preservation, maybe.."
<Alcar> This could be FUN!
Quote 3561
<metshad_snowed_in> of course im a plot device
<metshad_snowed_in> im the DM :P
Quote 3562
<Mors`^> So, I take it the survival rate is so low, you are going to kill us off to end the campaign?
Quote 3563
<scapegoatDM> The path begins levelling out but the blood continues to flow, not rising at all. Some begins coming down - or perhaps out of - the walls. You can hear whispers at thwe very edge of hearing that might be voices.
* Rene`- whistles and has a manner similar to if we were walking along a pleasant wooded trail.
<scapegoatDM> A few of the villagers give Rene horrified looks
<Rene`-> (( "After we kill him, I have first dibs on the lair!" ))
Quote 3564
<Rene`-> "I wonder what kind of songs a bard would be coming up with for a story like this." *shudders, the first time she's seemed phased by anything since we got here :P*
Quote 3565
* Allynor should pay attention to xp more often, but it's never been that important :)
<scapegoatDM> Not that important? This is a d&d game, how can you say that?! :p
<Mors`^> lol, it is very important, especially when you are about to fight cthulhu.. every level counts =p
Quote 3566
<Maranda`-`> question.... with my sence of hearing so high, could i try and figur out where its exactly located by trying to lisen to it (ie its center) and try and strike out at that
<scapegoatDM> it has no center :)
<Maranda`-`> well fuck
Quote 3567
* Maranda`-` could try and charm it
* scapegoatDM stares at Keith
<scapegoatDM> Charm Cthulhu?
<Maranda`-`> charm demon, it says it works exactly like charm person other then it doesn't define a form it works on
<scapegoatDM> You don't have enough tentacles, for one thing.
Quote 3568
<Mors`^> "Cut her... and pour th blood... on the seal..."
<Allynor> "You mean she can be dead?"
<Mors`^> "I don't.... Know... It's worth... a try..."
<scapegoatDM> The dead body doesn't reply.
* Mors`^ didn't expect it to, it's dead =p
<Allynor> "Maranda is on her way back. If the dead blood doesn't work, I think I can revive her."
<Mors`^> "Not unless... we have to... They don't like... it..."
<Maranda`-`> "I know you have just been resorected but we need you to bleed to death on this ground too.."
Quote 3569
<scapegoatDM> Lyrin: "What is your curse?" quietly.
<Baliadoc> "I'm trapped in this mask. Doomed to repeat my life until I someday repent for my arrogance, or perhaps until I regain my full memory."
* Baliadoc lifts his mask up slightly, to reveal he has no face, just empty space (much like his players head! ;)
Quote 3570
<Alcar> elf pc with centaur son? :)
<Chaos`^> uh... ok
<Keith`> "yes son i had to kill your father when he broke his leg"
Quote 3571
* Alcar does assume his pc is embarrassed a LOT by his son, tho :)
<Chaos`^> "Can I ride you? My feet really hurt... ... THat's no way to talk to your father!"
<Keith`> alcars pc's ex-wife while talking to the other village woman "Now if he had half the size of his son has between his legs i would have stayed with him dispite the horse insodent"
Quote 3572
<Kirith> Politically correct d&d. It would be so much fun :)
<Kirith> "My pc lifts his enormous, freudian phallic symbol and charges you.."
<Kirith> "The knight, in his noble but misguided need to preverse the patriarchical system, steps between you and the lord with his weapon drawn."
<Kirith> "The cleric beings praying, cvalling upon her nondenominational, genderneutral deity in a manner that, while not between equals, does not serve to continue the master/slave relationship of gods and followers over the millenia.."
* Kirith stops now before I begin to scare myself.
<Ruedan> oh thank god
<Daino> "in doing so, a logically explainable phenomenon, of which a logical explanation has yet to be dervied, concurs, results in the apparent benefit of the surround malevolent supposed acquintances of hers"
<Kirith> no, they're not malevolent, they're "socioeconomically challenged"
Quote 3573
<Daino> "You walk into the public-available congregation point of the local adult population who are just looking for a good time after work. As you approach the not underpaid, as the socially employed economic program provides for the difference in his lack of salary, liquid/beverage attendant/homogenizer, and ask him for a container filled with a chemical combination of multiple fermented grains and fruits which when consumed produce the effect of
<Daino> supposedly pleasure, regardless to the possible or apparent danger to ones health or judgement"
* Daino takes a deep breath, and never breathes it out. EVER
Quote 3574
<Kirith> "This game we're about to play has been cancelled due to it;'s sexist, ageist, weightist, heteropatriarchialist, intellectualist, observationalist biases and that it's socioeconomic biases prevent it from being played by the computertectually challenged. We apologise in a sincere manner"
Quote 3575
<Ruedan> 'Where's Amandis?'
<Aaowen> "He's dead"
<Ruedan> 'Wha...oh well thats really too bad'
<Dungeon_Master_M> Cassandra: "Dalendaryn is going to try getting them revived."
<Kirith> « Thats IT? No plan to go hunt down the killer, demand vengeance from the gods? *sobs* :p »
Quote 3576
<Dungeon_Master_M> The Guards, where all wearing Studded Leather, and carried Longswords. You find nothing or Real Value, a few Gold Coins (22 gp Total) and a rough map of the northern Forests attached to a letter describing the increasing number of Pigmy attacks in the area.
<Worra> (you've now got SIX bodies to explain instead of one)
<Dalendaryn> "Ok. We've killed three militia. This poses a serious problem."
Quote 3577
<Dungeon_Master_M> Cassandra: "For now it is not safe for us here."
<Ruedan> 'well then lets get rid of these bodies and get out of here, but how we gonna get rid of the bodies?'
<Aaowen> "we could always burn the bodies"
<Dungeon_Master_M> Cassandra: "And the Inn I suppose."
Quote 3578
<Kent```> "What the heck is going on?"
<Greg``> "Well, Kent, if that's you .... we're in another earth being attacked by somene and, hmm, system is down. Oh, and the espresso machine is dead."
* Kent``` gets to his feet, glad he ate before piling through the gateway from hell, then looks around the island, trying to figure out if anything's different, if we're all going to be destroyed soon, or what
* Kent``` turns and looks at greg
<Kent```> "There's no espresso?"
<Greg``> "I'm sorry about the machine. You camer here at a good time. You can clean up the kitchen faster than I can."
Quote 3579
<`Kelly> "Something was taunting me before, giving me, visions and um, saying I could be or have more"
<`Kelly> "what was that?"
<`Kelly> "was that you?"
<Greg``> Voice: No. That was you, might be you *frusterated* How do you think like that, with minds in minds, I's in I's. It's so confusing! Are you sure your sentient?
<`Kelly> "YES!, I'm senteint, what the heck are you anyway, I dont like anoying things in my head, you tell me now!"
Quote 3580
<Chaos`^> Harknar leads the way to the mountains.. It soon gets cold and you think your going ot get frostbi(te) (( ha! )) No rainbow bridges are in sight... but, perhaps tomorow... unless something happens that the pc's do, the sun goes down in the evil forest... one can only hope that they call it evil forest because it's pretty.
Quote 3581
* Alphari is currently a dark elf from Svartalfheim.
<Alphari> with a centuar at a son, too!
<aslhk> lol Alphari
* Alphari is too, aslhk :p
<aslhk> Alphari: I believed you =P
<aslhk> I'd have trouble imagining you play an elf character without a half-woodland-animal-child.
Quote 3582
<metallicshadow> +2 vorpal greatclub
<metallicshadow> aka mr. homerun
Quote 3583
<Myrth> (( Well, i'm not evil so theres really no one i'm plotting after and there aren't any kingdoms looking for lich wizards for hire, so i'm left in the dark for a job. This market sucks ))
Quote 3584
* Xemit comments something about getting there god to go vengfull on them inorder to become legends
* Ashi shakes her head and looks at Xemit "I was here before once. Pity it hasn't changed..."
<Xemit> "Talk about going from one side of the coin to the other"
<Zacharel> (( phew, I was afraid we did that somehow :P ))
Quote 3585
<Myrth> "This town sure is a bore."
<Ashi> "Even more than when I was here last. The ruling family are ..... unique."
<Myrth> "What do you mean?"
<Ashi> "They don't believe anything fun should be legal. I've never understood how they produce heirs, myself."
Quote 3586
* Zacharel wonders what this town would think if I was in my true form :P
<Ashi> They're have you killed for molting.
<Ashi> this is puritan paradise :p
* Zacharel is an angel for crying out loud! :P Ah screw em, let's burn the f*cking city down :P
<Zacharel> see there's proof, I censored a vowel :P
Quote 3587
* Ashi is wondering when the pcs actually will burn the city down. Nothing is more anti-pcs than an honest, hard working LG society :p
<Gabriel```> rofl
<Gabriel```> C/E rogue masquerading as a citizen. "Ah yes, Welcome to the city of... aw fuck it all. I can't do this! You all need to die, or get drunk, or something!! I mean, c'mon! You have to piss yourselves off!"
Quote 3588
<Ashi> Medrel stands up.
* Myrth chants a few small words and the bard begins to rise from his state of death.
* Gabriel``` blinks, at both the guard's yelling, and Medrel
<Gabriel```> "Okay, whoa whoa whoa! This is getting out of hand!"
<Ashi> The guard stares at the raised body and makes a choking noise
<Gabriel```> "Hey! Whoa! Down boy!"
* Gabriel``` runs over to the rising corpse, then tries to convince it to be back on the ground
Quote 3589
<Zacharel> dontcha love how a simple trip to see if we altered history can change into a mission to usurp a town government? :)
Quote 3590
<Myrth> king: "By the way, did you kill the former king?"
<Ashi> King Claudius: "WHAT? I am the King and you ask ME that? When I have seen this .. this outrage?!"
<Myrth> king: "I didn't think so, just asking for the sake of asking."
<Ashi> Hamlet and Gertude are frozen on the bed in rather awkward positions now
Quote 3591
* Myrth removes the crown from the king and puts it on the bartender's head then telepaths to the old king "Bow to your king."
* Myrth wispers to the barkeep "whats your name again?"
<Ashi> Bartender: "Bill."
* Myrth shouts "All hail Bill!"
<Ashi> Bartender: "Bill Shakespeare. Uh, why?."
Quote 3592
<Ashi> King Claudius "It takes more than a crown tobe king! He isn't even of noble birth!"
<Ashi> King Claudis: "For all we know, he could be some hack playwright!"
* Myrth slaps claudis accross the face.
<Myrth> "And whats wrong with playwrites?"
<Myrth> claud: "He could probly do a better job than you ever could."
Quote 3593
<Myrth> claudius: "No, you are no king. Chiefly because you never were in the first place. You were a over paranoid clutz with power, unwilling to listen to the subjects who drive your kingdom."
<Ashi> Claudis givs Myrth a confuswed look "Isn't that what being a king IS?"
Quote 3594
<macha^> damn, how do you argue to someone who doesn't know they are dead that they are dead and the body they use isn't theirs?
Quote 3595
<Gabriel``> "Macha! What is it?"
<macha^> "Lets just hurry to a cemetary, this is getting wierder than i'd ever imagine."
<macha^> "And the name is Myrth, not Macha."
<Gabriel``> "Be thankful that I want to give you a swift death."
<macha^> "What? Why kill.. kill me?"
<Gabriel``> "One guess."
* macha^ looks at Gabriel "Its not like i have a big choice in the matter."
<macha^> "I told you that Macha wasn't alive in the first place"
<Gabriel``> "Why not stay dead next time."
<macha^> "Well excuse me for living!"
<Gabriel``> "I think the point of the story is that I'm not excusing you for living."
Quote 3596
<Ashi> You ride out of the city of Veska, a haven for the lawful good of the world, now having to deal with a dead king, a new king, a dead bartender and a humiliated lawforce. The people eventually refuse to allow any travellers in, since you're all obviously evil.
<Gabriel``> makes sense :)
Quote 3597
<WarezBert> picard was a telekinetic with a specialty of manipulating waste products... he was always sitting down, then getting his #2 to go do stuff for him.
<Alcar> He was the perfect manager. Delegate, Delegate, Delegate. Do it well enough and you don't have to show up for work :)
Quote 3598
<Keith`> once in a game i was in someone RPed going to the can
* WarezBert screams in agony as the bowels of hell... oh wait, thats my bowels
<Alcar> With or without sound effects, keith?
<Keith`> nah just the i go off in the bushes and make a nasty smell
Quote 3599
<Darkkin> well paladins don't have to
<Darkkin> Every year they roll a fort check if they fail they take 1d20 damage from there rear blowing up
<WarezBert> nah darkkin
<WarezBert> no damage
<WarezBert> at the end of 1 year, they sit down next to a forge, and crap a holy avenger
* WarezBert watches the demons run in fear of his compressed corn&iron ration holy sword
Quote 3600
* Alcar once rolled an appliance - with no useful power - that was infamous.
* Alcar still can't figure that one out.
<Alcar> "Oh, those MIB? They want my dishwasher."
<Baliadoc> no, seriously, Alcar. c'mon: "Don't use that dryer. It always eats my socks."
<Baliadoc> now THAT'S an infamous appliance