A page of IRC quotes. Proceed with caution.
Quotes 2501 to 2600

Quote 2501
<Wyatt``> "By the way, where's the jeep? I need the rest of my guns."
<Hubert``> "It melted."
<Wyatt``> "It what?"
<Hubert``> "It melted. It's over where the orphanage used to be, if you want to go check."
<Damrirn> ((Note: Define all 6+ Letter words to Wyatt..))
Quote 2502
<AlcarGM> The sergeant looks at you "Oh, have we now?" His smile is rather unpleasant "And who are you?"
<Damrirn`> "I am Damrirn Bondobulol, an officer from 2006" <In a serious manner>
<AlcarGM> Sergeant: "Uh huh. Well, that IS a new one."
<AlcarGM> He looks at you "Who is president in 1980 then?"
* Damrirn` thinks for a moment "Nixon..Carter..Nixon..Carter..Jimmy Carter was in '80 I think.."
<AlcarGM> He frowns "After that?"
<Damrirn`> "After..oh jeez...Ronald Reagan, then George Bush, then Bill Clinton, then..umm...I think George W. Bush Jr..then.. ((whoever is president now))
<AlcarGM> Sergeant: "The actor?!"
<AlcarGM> Sergeant: "That was inventive, but no actor becomes president of THIS nation!"
<Damrirn`> "It gets worse..George W. Bush <sighs>.."
<AlcarGM> Sergeant: "Communist!
Quote 2503
<AlcarGM> (( its a bird! Its a plain! No, its ron man in black, with sort of bio-techo skin, and only eyes on the helmet (a la the Protoss in Starcraft, if that helps). the wings look something like a bunch of shards of quartz sticking out the back (which are currently retracting), and a stump of a left arm that is actually some sort of gun/cannon ))
* AlcarGM doesnt think it'll catch on ;)
* Lehrin changes his name to "Blackie?" and has to fight off the population of Harlem ;)
Quote 2504
<AlcarGM> ok, works. The figure ducks back inside
* Hubert`` puts the pistol away quickly (woo, now I gots me two pistols ;P) and runs in after the figure, shotgun ready
<AlcarGM> ok, it runs inside. you See it is female, 6' tall and looks EXACTLTY like a Barbie doll. A second one is beside her, and moves towards you armed with a big meat cleaver
<AlcarGM> The first one is going past her down a hall. There is a door at the end of it.
<Hubert``> "This is twisted." *as he shoots that the Barbie with the Lorana Bobbet Cleaver acessory ;P*
Quote 2505
<AlcarGM> Kris flips over. hes pale and has a cut on the left side of his cheek. Its not bleeding much. He looks at you "Where are we?!"
<AlcarGM> He shakes his head and gets beside you "I think we'd better get out .. "
<Hubert``> "The Old <whatever the hell it was> mansion, North of the city. Some twisted individuals has giant Barbie doll robots with guns and butcher knives guarding this place."
<Asahal> ((i must admit al the whole barbie thing is pretty fukd up))
<AlcarGM> (( waituntil you meet the person who MADE it ))
<Asahal> ((al i dont wanna meet you in person after this episode))
Quote 2506
<Asahal> "how well?"
<Nailo`^> (( is that a skill? ))
<Asahal> ((not if u fight like me))
<Ters> >> Can you kill a Wemic as easilly as an 8 year old could? <<
<Nailo`^> (( 8 year old troll =p ))
<Asahal> ((how old WERE those trolls cal?))
<Ters> >> No, Cal was killed by an 8 year old human commoner :) <<
<Asahal> ((dressed as a troll?))
<Caltak> (( thats a lie I beat the kid into the ground. Twice ;P ))
Quote 2507
<Caltak> "The world is weird. So weird is normal."
<Asahal> "pfft! thats just summin u lookat and say......."thats it im outa here""
<AlcarDM> Vel smiles at Caltak "Then what is normal?"
<Caltak> "If it existed, I'd tell you."
<Asahal> "look at cal, he aint normal"
Quote 2508
<Asahal> "cmon nailo..... what happened..... you can tell me"
<Nailo`^> "It's hard to explain really... We... rode... it was quiet and seemed long, and... well I was thinking to myself, and after about half a day of thinking, I decided something... then without a word, the thing brought me back to you guys..."
<Asahal> "odd" "so you dont exactly know what happened?"
<Nailo`^> "No... but I did come to some conclusions in the way I run my life..."
<Asahal> "how do you mean?"
* Nailo`^ shrugs
<Asahal> "fair enough"
<Asahal> "this is going in my epic you know..... i need details"
<AlcarDM> (( hehe Asahal ))
<Asahal> ((hey a bard ahs to have some sort of motivation))
Quote 2509
<Nailo`^> "Some epics have untold mysteries... Look at the demon and the lady..."
<Asahal> "but id say that the bard who wrote them knew exactly what NOT to say, therefore he knew the details"
Quote 2510
<Keith`> ok so what sick and twisted thing did you do to chao's charicter?
* Keith` known he should have killed that unicorn
<Alcar> oh, he cant kill anyone out of anger or be angry any more :)
<Keith`> is that all?
<Keith`> why couldn't you do that to caltak?
<Alcar> cause a) cals pc was male and b) the unicorn wanted a maiden and c) taking a wemic for a ride would have beenr reallty hard on its back :)
Quote 2511
<Chaos`^> ok.. anyway... lesse... you're in a forest, it's kinda hazy from some smoke, there is a small village behind you that thinks Ssakath is a demon... how can I make this worse....
* Sparkie is burning the forest down?
* Sparkie gives Chaos bambi eyes .. pwweesse?
<Chaos`^> no!
Quote 2512
<Warner> Corwin\\ you dont HAVE to stow away, but the party is looking for passage. What ever you work out that fits is fine with me
<Chaos`^> actually, you can head northwest into some very hilly territory, or head east to the Gray palace and the City of which I can't remember it's name =p
<Corwin\\> ((i still like the me just popping in idea, can't i buy passage with a blade made of solid mana?))
<Warner> is it me or is Chaos`^ talking about something compleately differnt
<Corwin\\> ((we're running a game warner))
Quote 2513
<Alcar> Hubert's arm feels like some cats tore it to pieces and Lehrin has a sucking stomach wound
<Lehrin> "You alright?"
<Hubert``> "Other than my brain and my arm, yes, I'm fine." *as he runs*
<Alcar> The thing is up and moving, but cant catch you
<Alcar> it doens't move that fast
<Lehrin> "Good to hear. Name's Lehrin. Sorry we didn't get a chance for proper introductions last night. I've been sent here to supervise. You think I could tender a resignation after this?"
Quote 2514
<Falsedragon> would they arrest you for stealing from a kender, claiming that whatever he had was yours originally?
<Alcar> Falsedragon - how do you prove its yours?:)
<Ters> Because you took it from a Kender :)
<Ters> So there's a 90% chance that it was yours at some point
Quote 2515
* Chaos`^ can just imagine a kender lbrary.. the emptiest building in town
Quote 2516
* Krysylyn stops, and throws her light out in that direction
<DarisisDM> Your light illuminates a deer and when it hits the ground the animal is frightened so it scampers off
<Gaty`^> (( kill it! ))
Quote 2517
<Gaty`^> (( you guys just passed up a stone of luck +2!! ))
<Krysylyn> ((we're not lucky enough to realize it apparently ;) ))
<Gaty`^> (( it gives you +2 to ALL ROLLS for good creatures!! ))
<Krysylyn> ((umm.. Gaty... I'm evil...))
<Gaty`^> (( oh well =p ))
<Gaty`^> (( maybe you're just... outgoing =p ))
Quote 2518
* Gaty`^ turns around and looks around
* Gaty`^ gasps and runs for krysylyn... and grabs her... you know... and knocks her down too...
* Gaty`^ is ontop of Krysylyn, but he has a look of concern on his face
* Krysylyn falls to the ground...
<Krysylyn> "not now, sheesh."
<Pagin> (( lust is an expression of concern where gaty comes from? ))
<Krysylyn> ((lust is about gaty's only expression))
Quote 2519
<Gestris> 1d20+9 - die!
<Unmentionable_Evil> Gestris, 1d20+9: 24 - die!
<Gestris> 1d8
<Unmentionable_Evil> Gestris, 1d8: 8
<DarisisDM> Damnit, Gestris! Do you bribe ALL of the bots?
<Gestris> no, I just tell them that you sleep with their sisters.
Quote 2520
<DarisisDM> No exp for that fight. No one got below -7 hit points, so it must not have been too chalanging.
<Darrele> Gestris came pretty close =)
* Gestris was close to dying :)
* Darrele stabs Gestric a little bit to drop him below -7
<DarisisDM> Ok, do a coup de grace on him and kill him. Then you can have exp ;)
Quote 2521
<Lehrin> "Hey bro! Did you tell your landmistress that I'm here to fix the damage I did the other night?"
* Lehrin has a total stoner accent
* Hubert`` looks back at the landlady. "He gets really bad at parties." *indicating Lehrin*
<AlcarGM> She looks at Lehrin for a long, cool moment "he sems the type." primly. She looks at Hubert "However, I would not have thought you to be the maty type Mister Brown."
<Lehrin> "Don't worry babe. Paid for all the material m'self, and I'm headed upstairs right now to fix things up."
<Hubert``> "Sorry about that."
<AlcarGM> At the word babe the room chills dramatically enough that you suspect supernatural involvement
<AlcarGM> She looks at Hubert "If it happens again, you are evicted." And walks out
<Hubert``> "Well, have a nice day to you too." *long after she's already left :P*
Quote 2522
<AlcarGM> Hubert's phone rings
* Hubert`` picks it up. "Hello?"
<AlcarGM> "Hubert?" Its your boss
<Hubert``> "Yes, it's me. What's up?"
<AlcarGM> "You're at work right now." flatly
<Hubert``> "Just kidding. I'm not really home right now, this is just the machine. Convincing, no? Just leave a message after the tone, and I'll get back you as soon as I can. Beeep." *hangs up*
<AlcarGM> LOL
<AlcarGM> The phone rings again
* Lehrin gives Hugh a really weird look
Quote 2523
* Alcar is now really tempted to do this plot in WW3 ....
<Keith`> your the dm
<Alcar> yeah, but I dont want to end ww3 .. it might not end it (depending on pc actions and players reactions)
<funny-ooc> i thought faline was WW3
<Keith`> WW3 (wasted world 3)
Quote 2524
<Alcar> She looks at you "I consider those people my friends." Her voice becomes soft, and somewhat menacing "They are doing more to help this city than most fat, donut-devouring pigs in uniform ever do .. "
<Damrirn> OOC - Is this the Vampire that the PCs tried to kill?
<Alcar> nope. Shes a waitress at a restaurant north of town :)
<Damrirn> ahh..wtf? :)
Quote 2525
* Terin comes skipping up to Armen
<Terin> Hey armen, you know we are probably going to die, right?
* Armen Turns and grins at Terin
<Armen> I don't know about me, you definately.
Quote 2526
* Caltak considers maing a femal elf whos bitter about not being able to get any because all the males are too busy with their "animal companions"....nah :P
Quote 2527
<Salem_> then you were created.. you exist..
<Angelica```> (( you dont have to be created to exist, duh ;P ))
<Salem_> or are you some figment of my imgantation
<Salem_> ((hush..))
<AlcarGM> She smiles, faintly "A bit of both perhaps. Something that always has been."
* Salem_ nods " i guess we are in the same boat.. "
<Angelica```> (( like drier lint! ;) ))
<Salem_> (( go eat your young...))
Quote 2528
<Caltak> (( so what did I miss? :P ))
<Nailo`^> (( the pc's are abusing me and sexually harrassing me... nothing much ))
<Caltak> (( oh cool I wanna do that too! :P ))
<Asahal> ((ur a wemic........itd be wierd))
<Alcar> (( So? Caltaks a wemic .. Nailo is an ELF. It wouldnt be wierd. For an elf, it would be normal :) ))
<Caltak> (( yeah, it could be an elf and a tarrasque and it wouldnt be weird :P ))
Quote 2529
<Caltak> "You just took it upon yourself to hurt him? For no real reason? What kind of lunatic are you?"
<Asahal> ((an orc))
<Gemm> "well it seemed right at the time. and he(asahal) seemed to like the mirror"
<Caltak> "It seemed right to attack him without provocation." *shakes his head*
<Magus`-`-> (and this coming from caltak... LOL)
Quote 2530
<Chaos`^> You guys leaving the other 4 bars of mythril behind?
<Drudwyn> ((I can carry some..plus i slipped my heavier stuff into Ssakath's pack))
<Chaos`^> (( what pack ;))
<Drudwyn> ((eww, then i must have slipped it into one of Ssakath's openings))
Quote 2531
<Chaos`^> "To get into the trrrreasurrrre room, you know what creates a boom. It flashes light and sometimes fights. It will only strike once if you are not a dunce."
<Chaos`^> She smiles happy with herself for thinking of such a great riddle.
<Corwin\> "Lightning."
<Chaos`^> "I will give you this long to figure it out..." she points to an hourglass... more like a 5 minute glass...
<Chaos`^> She frowns at Corwin
<Chaos`^> "That is correct..."
Quote 2532
<Corwin\> anyway, chaos, i plan to argue with it long enough for everyone to creep around to its back and stab it multiple times.
Quote 2533
<WarnerDM> ((who the heck is Troy?)
<Troy`^> (( the dagger thief!! duh =p ))
<Robert```> (( yeah, remember? ))
<WarnerDM> (nope)
<Troy`^> (( He stole the dagger and left Rober out in space to die... ))
<Robert```> (( remember? Gel towed him? and he tried to get away, I jumped on his ship, then fell off into space? ))
<Troy`^> (( and left the Gemini magica without paying!? Wouldn't Gel remember THAT!? ))
<WarnerDM> ((I certainly dont remember reintroducing him))
Quote 2534
<WarnerDM> The men follow soldiers orders and march the party to the brig
* Robert``` glares at soldier`^ but cooperates anyway
* Nurse`Darleen looks like a stern nanny " thats it.. i am telly-phoning all your mummies that you were bad.-dd boys.. and you will get no TV time, you hear me!"
* soldier`^ whispers to the officers with darleen to send her to the mental ward
<WarnerDM> No one seems to have hand cuffs that will fit a otyugh tentical. And no one has the hart to cuff darleen. But they do line up on either side and march you towards one of the bases buildings.
* soldier`^ doesn't feel that Darleen will do mare than threaten to call his disceesed mother, so he doesn't cuff her ;)
Quote 2535
<Drestin> "Elves arrested us..well because we're orcs"
<Reawen> "Ah. Oppression of minorities to further the tyrannical governments facist activities?"
<Drestin> "If only elves and orcs could get along <sighs>"
* Gene again shrugs
<Gene> "may also be because we try eat some of them"
* Reawen looks at Gene "Oh. Do the elves taste good?"
<Gene> "yea 'specially raw"
* Drestin looks at Reawen nervously "My brother is not quite in the right mind, this imprisonment is really getting to him"
<WarnerDM> "Now who knocked these bars over? I want a name"
<Reawen> "Otyugh names are difficult to pronounce, Unless you liked prolonged farting?"
* Robert``` gives Reawen a weird look for a moment
* Reawen tries to look innovent
<Reawen> innocent
<Robert```> (( you cant even spell it let alone look it :) ))
Quote 2536
<Cecil`^> You get the urge to look at her picture again =p
* Edward_DeAth looks at it oddly
<Cecil`^> You can see every portion of her body, every tuck and curve, and long to be there, looking at it...
* Edward_DeAth thinks he needs lots of sleep then
<Cecil`^> yeah, you crazy bastard =p
<Edward_DeAth> (( "Ah! The Kodak Succubus!" ))
Quote 2537
<Chaos`^> Alright, we last left our heros were about to get their asses kicked... oh yeah... they got a riddle wrong "Not it is not" the sphinx tells whoever said it was life
<Corwin\\> "What do yuo mean it's not life?"
<Chaos`^> "I'm affraid I'm going to have to kill you now..."
<Drudwyn> "Is it possible you can kill us after you give us the treasure?"
Quote 2538
<Chaos`^> She pounces on you and attacks
<Ssakath> (( it most contextx that line might be a good thing ;P ))
<Ssakath> (( well the first half of it anyway ))
Quote 2539
<Fermlin> Well any kind dm's wanna?
<Fermlin> I'll even get players?
<Fermlin> Come on there's gotta be someone who will
<Fermlin> God didn't make 5 billion people for nothing
Quote 2540
<Sintaqx> this is gonna be interesting to say the least
<Sintaqx> A football player artist, a cheerleading bratty pilot, and a man-hating bitch explorer....
<Alcar> the '00 generation of heroes :)
<Sintaqx> no shit
<Sintaqx> the millenium bug took 17 years to hit
<Sintaqx> "We're gonna be saved by THAT?"
Quote 2541
* Araka` cheerfully (in elvish) "We met Death."
* Locke`` raises an eyebrow at Araka
* Danguthilis nods, thinking Tynelis` and Araka were charmed by the witch
<Locke``> "Right... okay... Death. I think we need to get back to the city life. This whole god thing is messing with your brains."
<Tynelis`> "Locke``...if only I were kidding"
<Tynelis`> "I did not even speak to the woman"
<Tynelis`> "and I know her true nature"
<Tynelis`> "the plants knew...and the plants are something you don't argue with, for they hold more information than you are capable of dealing with"
<Locke``> "I hate hippies."
Quote 2542
<AlcarGM> Ok. .. you get dressed, eat, then go into the bathroom to do your usual stuff. When you open the toilet you find a head in it.
<AlcarGM> It's your head.
* Damrirn checks to make sure his head is still on before getting some gloves so he can take his head out of the toilet
<AlcarGM> You take it out slowly .... its definitely solid, and yours. A quick glance in the mirror reveals you have your own head as well.
<AlcarGM> What do you do with it?
* Damrirn squeezes it a little testing out its density
Quote 2543
<TexDKnght> I wonder if a 1st level is too low.
<Green-Ooze{m}> Each Level Your Character is has a Name . . . Level 1 & 2 = Cannon Fodder Level 3 & 4 = Divirtionary Targets Level 5 = Slim chance of Survival ¦¬þ
Quote 2544
<Sin\Away\> Sexual preference choiced for most races: Male, Female. Sexual preference choices for elves: Male, Female, Other. Sexual preference choiced for Elven Druids: Other
Quote 2545
<Alcar> oh, I know!
<Alcar> You want your pc to be 50' tall right cal?
<Alcar> How about I havbe an NPC morph you into a certain purple dinosaur?
<Alcar> you'd be 50' tall and children everywhere would follow you around ....
<Caltak> oh god Alcar, I'd have to kill you ;P
<Alcar> and if the military tried to shoot you there kids would never forgive them
<Alcar> you'd get marketing and PR. And you'd just have to appear on tv at . .what? 4 pm each day?
<Caltak> he'd be better off dead ;P
<Caltak> listen, he would go crazy and kill himself if he was turned into barny. and then kids everywhere would be scarred for life :)
Quote 2546
* Captain-Canada throws down his Clipboard and leaps up on the desk, undoing his necktie
<Captain-Canada> "I will stop this power supply!"
<Greg``> <Opie the Janitor> looks at the captain, then at the desk levelly "I hope you're shoes are clean."
Quote 2547
<Captain-Canada> "Um citeze, i mean students we are taking a feild trip follow me!"
* Greg`` sighs "A field trip?" He mutters something about school and walks down the hall towards the double doors. "And to think I used to dream of blowing up a school ..
* Captain-Canada who is really the self-proclaimed protector of Canada and not a teacher does not notice the remark about blowing up the school that would usualy be delt with by expulsion
Quote 2548
<Captain-Canada> "I am not your substitute techer, i am really....."
* Captain-Canada spins and tears off his teacher's suit all in one motion to reveal a full body Red&White skin tight suit complete with boots, gloves, and a utility belt, there is also a metal hockey stick on his back and a big White Maple Leaf on his chest
<Captain-Canada> "CAPTAIN CANADA!"
<Jamie`> "Oh god..."
Quote 2549
* Kent`` is a tall, strapping young man, who looks like he's spent a good amount of time on the farm, and has. He wears a blue t-shirt and red leather bellbottoms, which look handed down, and has glasses on. He has short black wavy hair, and bright blue eyes. Oh, and an incredibly perfect tan
<Andrew```> (( Bellbottoms? dear lord.. ))
<Kent``> ((just handed down clothes, from an old friend. Clark learned early on to switch the colors around :))
* Greg`` looks at Kent strangely "Why are you here? besides sharing his taste in fashion .. "
<Kent``> "Hmm? Oh, i was flying by. I don't think this guy likes people finding his home. You wouldn't happen to be evil, would you?"
<Captain-Canada> "No I'm not evil"
<Kent``> "Just making sure. You do have Canada as a theme, after all."
Quote 2550
<Kent``> "Well, if everyone could lift cars, superpeople'd be boring."
<Greg``> "Well, I think Im normal .. get the cat guy or something."
<Jamie`> "I *am* normal."
<Greg``> "You vanished into thin air!"
<Jamie`> "No I didn't! I think your power is too halucinate, you crazy drunk!"
Quote 2551
<Greg``> Captain-Canada feels a candian migrame compromising with him to be a minor headache coming on
* Captain-Canada gos back into the Canada Dome and comes back out with a big armor plate pointed Gauntlet with a Maple leaf on it
<Kent``> "Uhmm... whoa, you okay? Hey, I'm gonna try to keep catboy from getting himself in trouble. I'll be right back."
* Captain-Canada then holds his head and says
<Captain-Canada> "ouch"
* Captain-Canada get two asprin from his utility belt and swallows them
Quote 2552
<Jamie`> "If we are supposedly super heros, when do we get our utility belts?"
<Greg``> "Can you sew your own cape?"
<Jamie`> "Well, I could get a cape, but then I'd be too much like Batman. That's why I only want the belt."
<Greg``> "Just dont givie it a maple leaf."
<Jamie`> "I won't."
<Captain-Canada> "Awww"
<Captain-Canada> "You could be Maple-Boy if you did"
<Jamie`> "I don't *want* to be maple leaf boy"
Quote 2553
<Captain-Canada> "I like Apple Pie"
<Greg``> "Its not canadian. Are you allowed to?"
* Jamie` points at Captain-Canada and says "Traitor!" half joking
<Captain-Canada> "Well its is an adaptation of Le tarte de Pomme"
<Captain-Canada> "Of French origin, that they brang over here to what is now known as Canada"
<Jamie`> "Brought. And you call yourself a true Canadian... Can't even get your grammer correct."
<Captain-Canada> "There's your super power! being able to see what people talk!"
Quote 2554
* Captain-Canada gos back in the building and comes back out wearing Jeans and a leather Bomber's jacket, he still wears his mask though
<Kent``> "Closer. You're not gonna wear that mask, are you?"
<Captain-Canada> "What do you mean not wear the mask?"
<Kent``> "You look like a dork with it on."
<Captain-Canada> "With what on?"
<Kent``> "The mask!"
Quote 2555
<Captain-Canada> "Lets just go get some pie, wanna take the Canada-Mobile?"
<Kent``> "Uhm... right. No, I'll walk."
<Captain-Canada> "Oh, its not far?"
<Kent``> "Actually, I can just run back. I run pretty fast."
* Kent`` offers Jamie and Greg a lift. Literally
* Jamie` climbs onto Kent``s back
<Kent``> "What the heck!? Hey, I'm not some cheap french prostitute! I was just gonna carry you!"
* Jamie` climbs into Kent`s arms then :P
<Kent``> "Would you stop that!? I can pick you up myself, thank you very much! Sweet baby Jesus!"
Quote 2556
<Greg``> Ma looks up "Kent? Where have you been?" As she bustles around the old country kitchen. The smell of apple pie wafts through the air. "Peggy sue, you remember peggy right? Well, her folks are out of town, so shes just here to visit us."
* Peggy`Sue looks up from the porch " cousin Clark,. yer home!"
<Greg``> Ma wants to see you with a nice gf :)
<Kent_Clark> and she just called me cousin... you might wanna fix that, for sanity's sake :)
<Greg``> 2nd cousin :)
* Kent_Clark needs a drink
<Greg``> well, they do things differently in the country. and more often
<Kent_Clark> how close to home that hits... I live in Inbredville, USA. didn't expect to actually have to experience it ;)
Quote 2557
<Greg``> in the field Peggy Sue and Greg can see Kent talking to a person who looks like a humanoid cat, more or less.
* Andrew``` is what appears to be a humanoid puma dressed in a t-shirt and shorts :)
* Peggy`Sue blinks " oh.. cool, can we keep it? i want to name him Mr. Bigglesworth"
Quote 2558
<Alcar> You find yourself wishing you'd waited to save her corpse
<Danguthilis> "Its pointless to try to capture a dead person, though i suppose someone of your intellect wouldn't think so"
<Alcar> maiden: "intellect? I'M not the one who tried to take on two clerics of death with a pretty bird!"
<Alcar> She shoves past you "Stupid males."
* Danguthilis resists the urge to kill her and explores the rest of the building
Quote 2559
<Greg``> Pa shrugs "Well, if you don't have anywhere to go, theres some stumps I could use cleared in the south pasture. I can pay you."
<Andrew```> "Oh, sure thing."
* Andrew``` heads outside to go to the pasture
* Jamie` is out to pasture. His funeral will be held Friday morning
Quote 2560
<Kent``> "Right... yeah. I really doubt that there are any supervillains up here."
<Greg``> "We could be."
* Andrew``` looks down at Greg questionably. "yeah, but why would be want to do that?"
<Kent``> "Us? Nah. I'm not the evil type."
<Jamie`> "Why can't we be evil?"
* Greg`` looks at Andrew "Why not?" and shrugs
<Kent``> "Because I'd beat the living tar out of you?"
Quote 2561
<Andrew```> "Yeah what Kent said. If you're a supervillan, you got everyone against you, plus any superheroes. If you're a superhero, then you have all the non-villains on your side."
<Jamie`> "See, you need villans to go against you, so one of us is going to have to be evil. I nominate Andrew."
* Andrew``` blinks at Jamie
<Andrew```> "Hey, wait a second..."
<Peggy`Sue> without supervillians.. there would be no superheros
Quote 2562
<Greg``> When you enter, a receptionist - Mrs Quested, according to the sign on her desk - looks at you "Do you have an appointment with Mr Fielding?"
<Greg``> Mrs Quested gives you all a scathing look, sure you're here to do your taxes 2 months late.
<Kent``> "Sure don't, but I have an important issue to discuss with him>"
<Greg``> She raises an eyebrow "I see." in a polite tone. "I'm afraid Mr Fielding is rather busy right now."
<Kent``> "When will he be available? I would really like to talk to him about my family's farm as soon as possible."
<Greg``> (( The First Villian: Bureaucracy! Powers: Delay pcs 2, annoying 1 create red tape: 3 ))
Quote 2563
<Jamie`> "I can't beleive that you just did that. So you don't mind us becoming super villans?"
<Kent``> "Just don't hurt people." *starts walking off*
<Kent``> "What else was I supposed to do? I'm not gonna hurt him."
<Kent``> "I can't do anything. Some 'Superhero' I am."
<Greg``> "Uhm, you could learn to be subtle. Oh, even better, you can have Captain Canada visit him."
<Andrew```> "Kent, superheros generally don't battle evil accountants."
<Kent``> "Yeah, but usually superheroes don't have parents who've just lost everything that ever meant anything to them."
<Jamie`> "Yes they do, that's why they become superheroes."
Quote 2564
<Caltak> Fun Diety for Clerics: "Chanserv". CN. Chanserv's Domains are: Chaos (IRC is always unstable), Trickery (since you never know if you're still on), Destruction (GHOST command and kline), and Travel (splits). :)
Quote 2565
<Danguthilis> Alcar should add another trigger for a Sparkie Kick
<Danguthilis> saying '2e'
<Caltak> I agree.
Quote 2566
* Caltak really wishes there were some way to parlay his knowledge of D&D into some sort of money-making job :P
<ConnectionResetByPeer> You can have people pay you to shut up :)
<Caltak> hey, now that's an idea :)
Quote 2567
<Caltak> but mostly just cause I feel the rules are used because they are rules. If the rules arent liked, one could play in a free form system instead :)
<Baliadoc> well, it's not that so much as the rules just set the foundation. they don't build the house. the rules are just subcontracted to get a basic idea of what's going on ;)
Quote 2568
<Jeramias> for the platform CARPG my friend and I are making I suggested that the character should need to sheath her sword to cast a spell. He thought that she should also gather a cirlce of stones arround her. I think that he was mocking me.
<Baliadoc> i'd say "Sure, but let me go get some rocks so you can show me what you mean." Then, go get a big one and wait a while. when he gets bored and starts playing on the computer, rush in and beat him over the head, then say "How d'you like the rock idea now, bitch!?"
Quote 2569
<Locke``> "Son of a Jackal! I've gotta get this figured out! Everyone, out of the room!"
<Tishsa> "What did you do?"
<Locke``> "Whatever it was, i lost my bond with Terry! He doesn't know we're friends anymore!"
<Tishsa> "Oh shit, that isn't good at all."
<Araka`> (( "Quick! Distract it with a giant Twinkie!!" ))
<AlcarDM> Gandolt: "It is a familar. What does that matter?"
<Locke``> "It's not a familiar anymore! I'm bonded to something else! Now the bloody Terrasque, and yes, it is a Terrasque, thinks I'm a midmorning snack!"
Quote 2570
<Araka`> "Oh come on you can do better than that to find a good hobby. Killing things is your job, so thats not a good hobby."
<Araka`> "You should find something to take your mind off the whole Death thing. Killing and such can be pretty depressing, so if you take your mind off it sometimes, you might be able to get into a good mood." *smiles helpfully*
<AlcarDM> Death (almost shtyly) I Tried Poker Once. The Humans Cheated. So I Killed Them All.
Quote 2571
<Jeramias> "We have hundreds of highly trained people, but we're going to send YOU to save the world because you are still level 1."
Quote 2572
<Armin```> "well, some vietnamese wizards summoned her to destroy america for leaving the war"
<Alcar> Comte loooks at Armin "To destroy ... huh. Like Rome." he frowns "Why is she here then?"
<Armin```> "maybe it has something to do with the mayor"
* Hubert` shrugs. "Maybe she's going to try to convive the mayor to eventually run for president or something and then take the country down from the inside?"
<Alcar> Comte: "Perhaps. That would make sense. I do wonder though ... "
<Alcar> Kris: "I dunno. Is she stupid enough to think that the government is actually there to help us? I mean, if we got rid of it, would it be a big loss?"
<Armin```> "Anarchy isn't usually a good thing"
<Hubert`> "Thats what the government would have you believe, Armin."
Quote 2573
<Kent``> "I've never been shot. I think I could take it though, how tough could it be?"
<Kent``> "Besides, I can probably move faster than he can shoot."
Quote 2574
<Greg``> The Fanatic laughs "You fool! the only worth lies in hearing the words of Hitler, a REAL man!"
* Kent`` looks at him seriously for a second before breaking out into laughter
<Greg``> The fanatic looks disgusted
<Kent``> "You're kidding me! Oh man... you listen to a guy who wet his bed even when he was leading the Nazi's! Hoo boy! That's rich! Did you not make it to World History in high school or something?"
<Greg``> Fanatic: "I wont believe your lies, heretic! Real men wet beds!"
* Kent`` laughs harder
Quote 2575
<Kent``> "Hey Ma, Pa! We're back!"
<Greg``> Ma Clark looks at Kent "What happened?"
<Greg``> Ma Clark looks at Kent "Well? Our accountant phoned us saying you tried to bully him . .then we see a video of you flying around town .. "
* Kent`` explains the day to them, leaving out the whole "I tried to throw the accountants office into orbit" thing
<Andrew```> (( oh you mean the "I tried to throw the accountants office into orbit, and had to be stopped by the giant cat who, oddly enough, was the more sane one at the time" thing? :) ))
<Kent``> ((Hey, if you were losing your home, you'd want to throw buildings around too. Or at least easily breakable stuff.))
Quote 2576
<AlcarDM> The gnomes souvenir from the night is three words "You're a daddy!"
<Caltak> (( oh christ :P ))
<Caltak> (( wait, is that even possible? ;P ))
* AlcarDM really hopes not
<AlcarDM> she gives you a farewell kiss and says she'll always remember you
* Caltak trys to reply with something but only manages to come up with a nod and the word "likewise" :P
<AlcarDM> She mutters something about "typical male."
Quote 2577
<Jeramias> Bali should run a game :)
<Baliadoc> sure. There's fun to be had for all. You learn some valuable lessons about working as a team, and even some about yourself. Then I give you experience. The end.
Quote 2578
<Sintaqx> DMing is similar to running a decathalon.. especially for the typical group of PCs that are recruited in this channel
Quote 2579
* Sintaqx needs to find one of his characters... a level 3 char (2 psi, 1 sor) with AC of 28
<Sintaqx> he wades into battle wavinghis quarterstaff around hoping he manages to hit something :)
<Baliadoc> if he was a halfing, he'd make a good sheild for a Half-Orc.
<Baliadoc> "Not only does my shield protect me, it casts magic missile!"
Quote 2580
* Ssakath runs after the goblin, passing it, being able to go 160 feet (if run really is x4 :P) and turning around to wait for the goblin :P
<`Merlin`> "Eeps agains!"
* `Merlin` scrambles to a stop, and then runs backwards
<Ssakath> (( run backwards, or turns around? :) ))
<`Merlin`> ((running backwards..... you gotta think like a goblin archmage....))
Quote 2581
* Ssakath trys to move, to find he's still tied up (since no one untied me at all)
<Chaos`^> The sphinx licks her lips wondering what lizardman tastes like...
<Atma``> "Hey, big guy, you awake?" *perfect Draconic*
* Ssakath trys to answer, but can't, since he has a giant spider leg stuffed in his mouth, and hes too tied up to remove it
<Chaos`^> "Is spider good?"
Quote 2582
<Chaos`^> Corwin heals you both due to the law of dm insanity, so you don't have to argue...
* Chaos`^ tries to remember if corwin is even a cleric...
<Chaos`^> he heals you anyway ;)
Quote 2583
<Ike> I just like Psionics Handbook because now I can throw Illithids at my players without them getting slaughtered. :)
<Ike> The Illithids, that is...
<Ike> I don't really mind if the players get slaughtered..
Quote 2584
* Mordenkainen shots a greater arrow of dragon slaying against BLACK`DRAGON
* BLACK`DRAGON catches it effortlessly
* SIR_Talos pulls out his Dragon Blade and Decapitates Mordenkainen
<Mordenkainen> yeah... and then you wake up and fall out of the bed =)
<Mordenkainen> NOOOOOOOOO
<Dungeon_Master{mf}> *Poof*
<Dungeon_Master{mf}> "Watch me!"
<Mordenkainen> I'm your greatest NPC! You can't un-do me!
* Dungeon_Master{mf} would like to remind the players that Mordenkainen never exsisted
Quote 2585
* Zee``` helps the wife with the cooking, then goes to sleep after dinner, thanking the family profusely
<AlcarDM> the wife gives Zee 100 bonus experience for being polite and some food to take with him
<Caltak> (( hey, so being nice to kids doesnt get you extra exp? heheh ))
<Ters> >< Cal, eat a couple of them and see if that gets you any ;) ><
<Caltak> (( LOL, naw, been there, done that, Ters. Never seems to help my pcs' popularity :P ))
Quote 2586
<Chaos`^> How did everyone react when the dead people came up?
* Caltak left
* Baliadoc made them dinner
<Alcar> ran away, of course
<Alcar> tho magus did ask them questions until they decided to try and drink his blood
* Chaos`^ ran?
<Baliadoc> we used you as a diversionary tactic. you're in the digestive systems of many different dead people.
Quote 2587
<Nailo`^> So how do you kill undead? or did my master never get that far in teaching me? ;)
<AlcarDM> disrupt undead spell :)
<Nailo`^> That's IT!?
Quote 2588
* Douglas_Bounderby sticks close to Caltak, since he's the only one that actually seems nice.
<Douglas_Bounderby> (( And he's the Wemic Barbarian, at that... ))
Quote 2589
* Nailo`^ sets down and begins reading out of her 'diary' quickly, going over the steps to kill an army of undead =p
<Caltak> (( Step 1: Call a guy from S-Mart who works in Housewares ))
<Caltak> (( Step 2: stand back. ))
Quote 2590
* Ters swings his sword arround for flavor and then thrusts into the nearest undead
<Zee```> "What are you still doing, Ters? Run!"
<AlcarDM> The undead staggers, then swings a fist back, as if trying to swat a fly
<Zee```> "Do you people not understand the words coming from my mouth? No wonder I hate mages!"
<Ters> "I'm not a mage, Zee! I won't let you do this alone!"
<Zee```> "And you don't have a choice in the matter! You don't understand my people. Just save your own bloody life! I don't die easily."
Quote 2591
<Douglas_Bounderby> (( That's my point Alcar... An army wouldn't be full of high or even low level fighters.. It'd be soldiers, at best, and most likely commoners. ))
<AlcarDM> (( depends on the nation ))
<Douglas_Bounderby> (( Still. It's the core of the system... Even the best DM can't make up for the fact that an average peasant is not only no match for a low level fighter, but isn't even in the same league as it. ))
<AlcarDM> (( the average peasant is a myth. The old, retired level 15 fighter is the reality :) ))
Quote 2592
<Nailo`^> "I can't leave the best chef in the world to be lunch for some random zombies!"
Quote 2593
<Caltak> hmm, I jsut though, Two-bladed swords must have a weird looking sheath.
<AlcarDM> oh, you wont have to worry. its silver
<AlcarDM> eventually, it will hit someones armour and just bend :)
<Caltak> but its a +2 so its magic and resist damage more than normal stuff does, alcar :)
<AlcarDM> it used to be +5
* Caltak does point out magically enhanced weapons like this are supposed to be really resistant to getting damaged :P
<AlcarDM> getting bent into a pretzel doesnt damage it. It just a) becomes abstract art or b) hastens its changing into a plow
Quote 2594
<Bali[Finalizing]> can I lower my int?
<Ike> Why?
<Ike> You're a dragon...
<Bali[Finalizing]> yeah. if i lower my int, my character creation process goes faster. i can have less skills. just wanna make it 10 or something
<Caltak{pcstuff}> yeah dragons are spose ta be smart. you could be a retarded dragon tho :)
<Pan`Ku> it's possible
<Pan`Ku> but odds are it wouldn't be a very old retarded dragon
<Pan`Ku> dumb dragon = dead dragon
<Ike> I mean... 13 is good...
<Ike> But less than that would be rather pathetic for a dragon.
<Bali[Finalizing]> that's okay, i have 20 now :)
<Ike> Jesus...
Quote 2595
<Bali[Finalizing]> oh shucks. if i have fire breath, i can forge weapons and armor without a source of heat besides my own
Quote 2596
<IkeDM> The main doorway swings open and a giant of a man, emerald green in color with large white wings and penetrating yellow eyes walks towards you all.
* Dracana`^ looks at mr. clea-- err green...
<IkeDM> He speaks in a booming and commanding voice. It almost frightens you how loud it is.
* Ansomn decides not to make any jolly green giant jokes
Quote 2597
<IkeDM> "It is this reason that I have summoned you here. The brotherhood must be stopped from decieving the good people of the earth."
<IkeDM> "Their leader goes by the name of Azrael Diomedes. He is truely a force to be feared, even by immortal standards."
<IkeDM> "He is decietful, cunning, and sadistic to an exacting art. He will be your main opposition."
<IkeDM> "You may wonder why I've summoned you for this task as opposed to someone else."
<Lao``> "You want the best?"
Quote 2598
<Ansomn> ((does anyone have magic items or not?))
<Lassie``> (( I have a collar and bandana ))
<Dracana`^> (( Bannana? ))
<Ansomn> ((magic banana of ...nevermind, that's just gross))
Quote 2599
<IkeDM> At the end of the hallway a giant globe of incandestent green is whirling loudly, and you can see a rather old and wise looking gnome running a bit of machinery around it.
<IkeDM> The gnome speaks up. "So you're the group that's gonna save the planet, eh? Don't look too impressive to me.. Why in my day we were a lot better looking."
<Lao``> "Well, not everyone can be blessed with such large noses."
Quote 2600
<IkeDM> You live in Dardunelles. :)
<IkeDM> And are currently engaged in combat with a fierce enemy... A 3 headed dog that breathes fire... *cough* Cereburus *cough*..
<IkeDM> BTW, this is your biggest rival around these parts. ;)
<Lassie``> rival to which? Being the top dog? Star billing? Coke ads?
<IkeDM> Uhm... The collection of bones in a local cave? I dunno...